| Thursday, October 14th, 2004 |
| 12:27 pm |
head start
When I dream, it as an observer. It is very strange, because my body will do something, but my mind will try to figure out its motivation. I often find myself turning everything I love into ruin. I find the moment in which the hero realizes that his prosperity is temporary to be the most amusing. It is very humiliating. It happens with such frequency, that I do not try to resist it. I simply try to piece together the story. I like to see how I can humble myself. In the midst of such a downfall in reality, I let it wash all over me. I don't even try to stop it. I bring this up only because I've been acting up in my dreams lately. Here is my hit list: Jeff - beaten over the head with a crack pipe Karen - punched in the face Anja - bitten in the vagina Andy - strangled cats - disemboweled with steak knife self - choked on chewing tobacco or tar (not sure) So watch the fuck out. |
| Sunday, October 10th, 2004 |
| 11:45 pm |
...
I browse the internet for the articles. |
| Friday, September 17th, 2004 |
| 11:24 am |
I just realized something. If Christians want gays to stop boning, why don't they let gays get married? I heard it's all downhill from there. |
| Thursday, September 16th, 2004 |
| 3:11 pm |
I want some beers
I missed out. Today, there was a Jew convention AND a pervert arrest at work, and I only witnessed the aftermaths. I saw a bunch of Jew-beanie wearing old, rich dudes with their blue-haired wives marching to their cars. They left the scent of hollandaise sauce. These weren't your New York Jews. No sir. These were your Auschwitz Jews. I didn't dare make a joke about their crooked noses or crooked banking. They would have broken me down, gagged me with matzo balls and fucked me like Anne Frank. Jesus Christ, I love Jews. Then, I hear there was some pervert around the dance department. All the descriptions I heard of him were rather bleak, though. One woman said he "asked for a job application and stole some paperclips." Fucking perverts. Someone else said he was following around girls. But, I mean, there's a disproportionate number of girls in the dance major. The department is so saturated with tits and ass, he's bound to get a little side tracked. Give the little fella a break. Anyhow, that all apparently came to an end with him face down on the floor surrounded by the intimidating ends of policemen's guns. All I can think about that situation is how much it hurts to lay on concrete with a boner. |
| Wednesday, September 15th, 2004 |
| 5:16 pm |
blathering blatherskite!
I can't stop thinking about that character Gizmo Duck from Duck Tales. You know, the half-Robo-cop, half-Inspector Gadget motherfucker? Whenever he wanted to put on his suit, he'd say blathering blatherskite and the armor would attract to him. I think his day job was professional bean counter and lived in a trailer park with his mom, watching soap operas and eating TV dinners. There aren't enough white trash superheroes. Fuck Superman. I hope something terribl... oh, whoops. Sorry, Chris. |
| Tuesday, September 14th, 2004 |
| 1:09 pm |
que?
Being hit on by a fat, little, gay, Mexican man is hilariously awkward. Neither one of us had a fucking clue what the other one said. I think we're going to make babies on Thursday, but I don't speak Mexican all that well. |
| Saturday, August 14th, 2004 |
| 7:28 pm |
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| Friday, July 9th, 2004 |
| 6:29 pm |
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| Tuesday, June 22nd, 2004 |
| 1:15 pm |
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| Sunday, June 20th, 2004 |
| 1:08 am |
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| Friday, June 18th, 2004 |
| 12:58 pm |
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| Thursday, June 17th, 2004 |
| 12:26 am |
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| Saturday, May 22nd, 2004 |
| 2:01 am |
Whatever. Had an idea. Think I'd rather lay down. |
| Wednesday, April 21st, 2004 |
| 1:24 pm |
...
What a load of pretentious horse shit. Such inanity is hereby restricted to insobriety. Otherwise, poop jokes and sarcasm ensue. Because I just love crappy jokes. |
| Tuesday, August 20th, 2002 |
| 11:24 pm |
empathy is mankind's greatest asset. |
| Monday, August 19th, 2002 |
| 12:17 am |
time is the unit of measurement for want. |
| Sunday, August 18th, 2002 |
| 9:08 pm |
as all things are temporary, the anticipation of their ends detract from the pleasure they provide while they exist. |
| Tuesday, April 16th, 2002 |
| 4:30 pm |
it is impossible to find a definite answer to an equation with an unknown variable. God is such a variable, and claiming to possess certainty in knowing his characteristics is laughable. this is false only when x=0. |
| Tuesday, February 26th, 2002 |
| 5:53 am |
man power is an odd commodity. it is finite to the individual and infinite to the whole. it is depreciated in value as per he who cherishes it the least. life, to the individual, is costly in this sense. an economy as wealthy as this should be treated with respect when its resources are spent wisely, and with disgust when they are spent brashly. I just want to be broke for once. |
| Tuesday, October 16th, 2001 |
| 9:53 am |
symbolism is the enemy of sanity. |
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quittermike's journal
